Amsterdam 2019, last year: I walked around the city in the mourning of my life, with the awareness of being there to redeem regrets.
Mom’s of never having seen the Van Gogh Museum.
Dad’s of not having brought her there.
And mine for not giving her the book from the museum she asked me for.
Widow of promises.
How absurd life is.
I’d never have imagined such a situation: me alone at home and my sister alone in the north of France, for 6 months of Erasmus.
But on Halloween’s day, after a month apart from each other, we made an appointment in Amsterdam.
Like in a movie. That journey that Mum would have liked to take and that Dad regretted having missed.
We were there to celebrate 3 events:
- Simona’s name day (28 October);
- Halloween, always a special day and now even more precious;
- Mom’s birthday (November 1) by going to the Van Gogh Museum.
I had been there in 2016, and I had brought her from there that book she wanted, with all his works. I lied to her saying I hadn’t found it: I wanted to surprise her at Christmas, without knowing she wouldn’t be there.
We arrived in Amsterdam on October 31st, we put on makeup in the hotel, took these photos, and went out in the cold of the night.
We ate a pizza in Dam Square and then went to The Amsterdam Dungeon: a journey through the centuries of the most frightening and macabre moments that happened in the city, with stories and legends told (in English) by talented actors, special effects and crazy sets.
Funny with that hint of fear perfect for Halloween night, I couldn’t have imagined a better way to celebrate.
(The attraction is open all year, but filming and photography are prohibited).
We went back to the hotel waiting for midnight with a candle.
Happy Birthday Mom.
How absurd life is.
She takes the things you care about and makes them even more special, in the most congenial – and formative – ways to her, muffling them with nostalgia as if to protect them.
What used to be simply beautiful is now precious melancholy happiness. A different value.
Ps. I’ll tell the whole Amsterdam trip in a dedicated post.
Amsterdam 2019, l’anno scorso: camminavo per la città nel lutto della mia vita, con la consapevolezza di essere lì a riscattare rimpianti.
Quello di Mamma di non aver mai visto il Museo di Van Gogh.
Quello di Papà di non averla portata.
E quello mio per non averle dato il libro dal museo che mi aveva chiesto.
Vedova di promesse.
Com’è assurda la vita.
Non avrei mai immaginato una situazione del genere: io sola a casa e mia sorella sola nel nord della Francia, per 6 mesi di Erasmus.
Ma nel giorno di Halloween, dopo un mese di distanza l’una dall’altra, ci siamo date appuntamento ad Amsterdam.
Come in un film. Quel viaggio che Mamma avrebbe desiderato fare e che Papà si era pentito di aver perso.
Eravamo lì per festeggiare 3 eventi:
- l’onomastico appena trascorso di Simona (28 Ottobre);
- Halloween, da sempre un giorno speciale e adesso ancora più prezioso;
- il compleanno di Mamma (1 Novembre) andando al Museo di Van Gogh.
Io ci ero stata proprio nel 2016, e le avevo portato da lì quel libro che voleva, con tutte le sue opere. Le avevo mentito dicendo di non averlo trovato: volevo sorprenderla a Natale, senza sapere che non ci sarebbe stata.
Siamo arrivate ad Amsterdam proprio il 31 Ottobre, ci siamo truccate in hotel, scattato queste foto, e uscite così nel freddo della notte.
Abbiamo mangiato una pizza in Piazza Dam per poi andare al The Amsterdam Dungeon (La prigione di Amsterdam): un percorso attraverso i secoli dei momenti più spaventosi e macabri accaduti nella città, con storie e leggende raccontate (in inglese) da bravissimi attori, effetti speciali e scenografie pazzesche.
Divertente con quel pizzico di paura perfetto per la notte di Halloween, non avrei immaginato modo migliore per festeggiare.
(L’attrazione è aperta tutto l’anno, ma è vietato filmare e fotografare).
Siamo tornate in hotel aspettando la mezzanotte con una candela.
Buon compleanno, Mamma.
Com’è assurda la vita.
Prende le cose a cui tieni e le rende ancora più speciali, nei modi a lei più congeniali – e formativi – ovattandole di nostalgia come a proteggerle.
Quello che prima era semplicemente bello, adesso è preziosa felicità malinconica. Un valore diverso.
Ps. Racconterò tutto il viaggio ad Amsterdam in un post dedicato.
It is great you have given tribute to your mother’s life this way, by celebrating her birthday in Amsterdam and visiting Van Gogh museum that she wanted to visit. Very inspiring photos and text! Your look makes me think of Llorina , a traditional Mexical song I simply adore and often listen on repeat.
Really? I need to check the song, I truly love this kind of sharings, these exchanges that somehow enrich us both, thank you Ivana❤️ xx
You have a beautiful and unique way of story telling through words and pictures, Dasynka! I love it! I’m glad you got to celebrate your mom’s bday. I’m so sorry you were not able to give her the book, but your intent was there. Big hugs!
These words really mean a lot to me, I appreciate every one of them, thank you very very much❤ xx
That was a beautiful way of celebrating your mother’s birthday! Love your make-up too
It was special 🙂 thank you so much! xx
This is such an emotional post. I really feel how much you long for your parents (especially your mom) and how they would have been delighted to go to Amsterdam with you. I hope that you were still able to feel your parents’ presence and love through your trip. It does look like you made the most out of your trip and enjoyed every bit of it, that’s what your parents would have wanted you to do 🙂
Wishing you all the best, and stay safe!
Your kind words touched me so much, thank you for being so emphatically sweet❤ Stay safe Claudine xx
First of all, I love your outfit. You did a great job with the makeup!! Life is crazy – I am glad that you are able to celebrate your mom’s birthday. I love that you’re celebrating her and doing the things that bring memories. Wishing you and your family the best xx
Thank you very much Nancy❤ xx
This is really an amazing image! And the environment is just perfect for this
It was, with no planning the room was perfect for the shooting 🙂 xx
Fabulous costume ❤
Thanks! 🙂 xx
This post is really emotional. I’m so sorry for your mom
Oh thanks❤ xx
Love the story you shared with these images.
Thank you for taking time to read❤ xx
Very special way to remember your mom!
Thank you Ashley❤ xx
Your costume and makeup are amazing!
Thank you Jill! 🙂 xx
Wow.. these are some amazing pictures.. you just nailed the Halloween look 🙂
Oh thank you very much! xx
You write beautifully hon and I love how you keep yuor mother alive through your creativity.
Really like the Halloween makeup and gothic vibes…with COVID there won’t be much of a Halloween in Berlin this year but I love the build up to Halloween, eerie makeup, outfits…the fantasy element so I really enjoyed this post! Xo
Thank you so much for your time and your words❤ in Italy we won’t celebrate Halloween as well, but I’m having a little pajama party (6 of us lol) just to stay together 🙂 wish you a lovely Halloween anyway xx
And she does it again!
Another slayed look ladies and gentlemen!
Hahaha oh thanks! xx
I’m so sorry about your mom. You nailed the Halloween look!
Thank you so much❤ xx
This look is so hauntingly beautiful. The flowers and veil are so gorgeous. I know you must miss your parents very much. Losing my Nana and just all the hardships coronavirus has brought has made me realize how important time with our loved ones is. Every moment with them matters because we never know when it will be the last. I am happy you have your sister in your life to adventure with you. Sending love and hope you have a happy Halloween <3
Oh Jill you are always so kind and sweet.
It’s true that we never know which are the last moments, so taking the best from everything is so damn important. This time is a big lesson for everyone❤
I’m very glad to have her.
We will celebrate Halloween at home this year, just us, but it will be special anyway, and I hope you’ll have a wonderful one too. xx
I love your writing, it really brings story to life and the amazing costume truly adds to it. So sorry your mother didn’t get a chance to make her wish come true or for any of you to experience it with her, but I believe visiting that place must have truly meant something special to you as well <3
Your words are full of empathy, thank you so much for this comment.
Visiting that museum was like having her with us, a way to allowed her to see everything herself, cause I truly believe she is always with us❤ xx
I’m so in love with your pictures.
I love the spooky vibes of it.
This place in Amsterdam sounds like the perfect one to celebrate Halloween.
It was really perfect 🙂 thank you Margot❤ xx
Dolcissime che siete, mi sono commossa a leggere questo post…..
Ti ringrazio di cuore❤ xx
oohh wow! i am loving the look!!
kisses from the sandpits of dubai
Oh thanks so! xx
Mi hai fatto ricordare di una volta quando presi un aereo per volare ad Amsterdam con ritorno in giornata, solo per andare a vedere quel museo. Ne valse la pena! Meglio vivere di rimorsi che di rimpianti!
Oddio questa è una follia bellissima, non l’avrei mai pensata!
E’ vero che è meglio cogliere ogni occasione senza rimandare nulla❤ xx
Amazing post! I love your makeup and costume! The photos turned out so well!
Thank you! It wasn’t very much planned so I’m happy with the result too 🙂 xx
Such a special way to mark the day, this was lovely x
Oh thank you so much, xx
Very faboulous styling! So spooky.
Hahah thanks! xx
Amazing costume! I never had a halloween party before because in my country we don’t celebrate it but this year I was planning to have a big one. Unfortunately my partner just got covid and we had to cancel it, but I hope next year we can do one 🙂
Thanks for the costume inspiration
hope you have an amazing weekend,
Oh I hope your parents are getting better! And I wish you to have a nice Halloween night anyway at home, at least, as we also do, cause we aren’t allowed anywhere now! Stay safe❤ xx
This looks amazing!